Today I am 5 week post-op from my PAO surgery. The physical recovery continues to seem to be normal. My bones, muscles and nerves are still repairing. There is still substantial bruising on my quad, thigh and glute, but it is slowly subsiding. I still do not have full sensation back in my quad and glute area, so it is pretty sensitive to touch. It feels very odd to have people touch it because I can feel the touch but it is dull. I am having more nerve pain in my quad but at least it is brief and periodic, not a constant pain. My left IT band and glute area are definitely experiencing symptoms as a result of compensation for no-weight bearing on my right side. I hope those symptoms do not develop into long-term problems and subside when I am able to resume to weight bearing on my right side. My pelvic region muscles feel like they are on fire a lot, which I am sure is a result of nerves. I get tired very easily. I ran errands with mom to pick out carpet and flooring, paint, and some bathroom materials, and by the time we were done, I was exhausted.
To be honest, at this point the recovery process I am more mentally exhausted than physically. We have a lot going on with moving, and obviously I cannot help with that process as much as I would like. It is very frustrating. I feel worthless not being able to help and relying on others to do everything for the move. I am very grateful to have family and friends willing to help, but I feel guilty not being able to do it myself, and I am not comfortable with allowing others to resume what should be my responsibility. It is very hard.
I am definitely very grateful for and have developed a stronger appreciation for my wonderful family and friends. Sean has been awesome helping me, and let me tell you, that is not an easy task because I am particular about the way things are done; therefore, I get frustrated easily and can be difficult to deal with. He has shown so much love and patience. My parents have been great helping out with things, and are being wonderful in orchestrating getting the farm house ready for us to move into, since I am not able to. I am truly blessed with great family and friends.
In general, I just want to be able to maneuver normally. I am finding myself feeling very bored. My PAO Facebook group and blogs that I have found through that site have been helpful as far as advice and support through the process. I continue to rely on the people in the group, as they understand what I have gone and am going through. It is helpful to have your feelings validated by others going through the same circumstances and experiences as you are.
Another advantage to this surgery is that I have and still am developing a stronger relationship with God. I have started to accept more that I need to leave my life and destiny up to him. He has a plan. I have been in prayer with him more and have been developing my faith more overall.
I am continuing to tell myself that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I have my next follow-up appointment on May 23rd, and my doctor will determine there whether I can go weight bearing. I am hoping for the best news!